The Last Leg of my daughter’s Journey to a pretigious MBBS deggree

The alarm rang at 5.45 today on 2nd March 2024. As usual we got up and called MS who was visiting his friend in London, before proceeding to pray Fajr. We already packed everything needed to take Sofi for her FINAL exams in Seremban. After discussing with Ak and Sofi and phone calls to the hotel, we decided to leave a little later than planned. You see, check in time to the hotel was at 2.30 pm. It usually takes 4 hours to reach Seremban from wbere we live. So if we leave at 9:30 am, it will be just nice to have lunch a d check into the hotel. That was the plan. The journey did not work out as our plan because exactly 2 hours later on the highway we came into a complete standstill. 

Apparently, a treller had overturned and caused a massive traffic jam on both the north and southbound traffic. In my lifetime, I have been in several traffic jams on the highway. Usually the traffic will move after about 15 to 20 minutes. This time, we were still at the same spot, after 1 hour of waiting in the car under the hot scorching sun. Initally we thought, this will of clear in a bot. But as time went by, we inly manged to cover about 5 Km in 2 hours. I remember my sister travelling to KL on the same day. Do I called her to warn about the traffic situation. Unfortunstrly, she too left just before us and now in the same situation as us. .. So after 4 hours in the traffic jam, we reached Simpang Pulai rest area which is small compared to the one in Tapah. We decided to take a break, pray and have our lunch. There was nothing fancy in this R&R. Ak snd Sofi had pau, which is a steamed buns with sweet snd savoury fillings. I had laksa noodle soup. Than I bought some red guavas and Sofi bought some waffle for dessert. Just then my sister called and informed us that the traffic had cleared and they are on their way to KL finally. We quickly got back into the car and continued our journey. Traffic started to flow but people who had bern stuck for many hours in the heat, were driving recklessly. Time and again I had to remind Ak to sliw doen. I can see he was slso getting tired. Since he had his frozen shouldre prinlem, he had bern having a lot if pain in his arm especially driving long distance. But what to do? I can’t drive long distance and Sofi is also not used to driving on this highway. Finally after another 2 hours, we entered Kl. According yo the GPS, it will take another 2 hours to reach our destination. So we have already sat through 8 hours. I reall pity the one sitting behind me. She ean really get overwhelmed with all that is happening just before sitting for the most important exam in her life. 

So finally around 7.30pm we reached our destination. The hotel we chose, Hotel Villa, is nothing to shout about. It is just a simple 3 star hotel in the location we want. Sofi did not want to stay in other hotels. She was familiar with the location here and getting in and out of the hotel was very easy. We settled down and had a good night sleep, Alhamdulillah. The next day was Sunday. Ak and I went for our morning walk after Subuh prayers. We went to the Lake Garden and was surprised to see very few people at the park. Back home, our parks will be full of exercise enthusiast especially on weekends. We saw only a few old people at this park. Later in the day we just tried to cheer Sofi up and kept ouselves busy. By evening, both her siblings called to wish her good luck. Sofi's exam day is on the same day of Ms's birthday. As a mother, it was very difficult for me to see one child miserable because of exams and another miserable because he far away from family on his birthday. We had to call Ms later to cheer him up. So afetr getting Sofi's clothes and all her OSCE apparatus ready, we settled down for the night. I set the alarm for 5 am, but end up waking up and 4 am.

So finally, the exam day dawn upon us. Sofi messaged at 6 am that she is awake and getting ready. Ak and I prayed and quickly called Ms who although is in another country, always is involved in everything we do. At 7.15 am we left to sent Sofi for her exams. We reached the campus around 7.35am. We parked the car and just waited awhile. I saw many anxious faces coming to attend the exams. Some came with friends, a few drove themselves and some came with family. Exactly at 7:43, Sofi decided to go into her examination hall. We gave her a hug and wished her all the best. For now, the door just shut behind her, and all that I can hear is the sound of birds chirping around the campus. 

They call me Sergeant Major

Growing up with my parents in the 70s and 80s, was very different from what we see today. My father was a well known and  wealthy businessman. He had  a chain of retail shop selling branded men's fashion. My father was a very hardworking man. I have not seen my father taking a nap, or watching television in day time during the week. Only on Sundays he was a little more relaxed and rests. Same goes to my mother. She is always doing some kind of chores at home. Having five children, a grand daughter and two cousins and a cat living with us, it was a constant cooking and feeding of the whole family. On top of that, she also loves sewing and embroidery. But as we were growing up, I remember she had no time to continue with her interests. In the 70s and early 80s, there was no fastfood restaurants where we lived. Everything we ate, was either cooked at home or bought from a 'Nasi Kandar' restaurant. As such, eating anything, I mean anything which is not rice, was a treat. Fried noodles, beehoon, murtabak, roti jala, capati, satay or samosa was a treat. In fact my mother sometimes tries to make jelly, and cakes for us. We would all eat happily having something other than rice. Pasta and pizza was not known at that time. in mid 80s Mc donalds, Kfc and Pizza Hut came to my country. That was when we first ate fast food. I remember saving my pocket money to eat Kfc on Saturdays with my friends. 

Nowadays we see so many restaurants and fast food around us. The variuos burgers, pastas, pizzas, cakes and other treats are available 24/7. Kids get to choose what they want to eat for every meal. Parents don't have to go through the tedious job of marketing, cleaning the fish, chicken, meat and storing them. Even there is Nasi Melayu, Nasi Kandar, Sushi, Arabic food, Turkish food all available on apps on the phone. Parents nowaday don't even have to leave the house to buy food. I remember how Ak used to go to the local restaurant and queu up to buy lunch or dinner when the kids were growing up in the 90s and early 2000. According to WHO worldwide obesity has tripled since 1975.  With over 4% children aged between  5 to 19 overweight or obese in 1975. While 18% in 2016.

 Changes in dietery habits plays a major role in this dramatic increase in obesity , as we see how the children and parents eat a lot of energy densed food that is high in carbs and sugar. Unlike before when I was growing up, kids nowadays sit and watch Tv or computer most of the time. In my childhood years, I used to come home from school, have lunch, do my homework and wait for Tv station to start at 5 in the evening. ( We had no Tv station operating before 5 pm on weekdays ). Then I used to watch cartoon until 6pm. Then it was playing time. Either I will go cycling or play with my niece and neighbourhood friends in the porch. Usually we will play until it is time for  Maghrib prayers. Than we will wash up, read Quran, finish up homework and finally watch tv until time to sleep. I carried this pattern with my own children. Of course their tv time was much more than mine and also it was harder to get them to go out to play. I remember chasing them to get up and move every evening. Usually it was I who actually got tired of running and shouting at them.

The scam of convenience, has also brought so much comfort but at the same time more misery in life. People are more sicker and sadder as opposed to before.  Everything you need is only a finger tips away. As long as you have money as they say... ( but now you can use credit cards even though you don't have money ). 

Today kids also feel they are more entitled and deserve things immediately without even working hard for it. When were growing up, we used to get hand me down from older sibling. Moreover new things were only bought for Eid or birthdays. That way there wasn't much wasting and shopping was also a treat. As kids, we used to look forward to go eid shopping because that was the only times we get to choose what we want.  Of course some of this upbringing style  I demonstrated on my children when they were younger. So I got the name Sergeant Major👮. They say I am very strict with them and do not shower them with things like how their friends parents do. They have to work hard and top marks in class before Ak and I buy them expensive gifts like bicycle, camera, play station etc. Actually I do not regret one minute for being called like that. In fact I take it as a badge of Honour from my children.  Because of this, till today, they are very careful with things they buy, and they don't procarsinate in their work.  I try my best to instill in them the values and tradition I learnt growing up, because I think old tradition keeps our soul and memories alive.  The joy of simplicity is not felt until you see this chaotic world of contant changing and upgrading and self indulging society. I do feel sorry for someof the children in this generation. Since the parents also grew up without any values and tradition, we see so many problems such as temper tantrum, social disorder, binge eating among children.  Parents in this millineum must make sure to hold on to the rope of religion, family values and tradition to ensure the future generation move away fro this unsustenable pace set by a fake , induging society. Only then they can find self sufiency and inner peace. God Willing.

Dry Taps Again !

We live in a beautiful island in Malaysia. Our main water source is from Sungai Muda. Recantly in 2023, we had 2 major water pipe burst that caused water crisis to almost the whole of Penang. At that time MS had come back from UK for holidays and Sofi was also on break. Having this two around was a blessings. They helped to carry water and fill up the water tanks upstairs. I have one 80 Gallon water container in my balcony. We store water inside here for emergency. Since it had been awhile since we had any water crisis, this water had become "stale"and cause itchiness, if we bathe with it. So now we had the tedious job of transfering this water to toilet tanks and the rest for washing and watering plants. Since the pressure was very low, we only had a little water coming from the hose in the porch. MS and Sofi, helped to transfer water from the porch to the balcony by tying a bucket to a rope and pulling it up. They managed to fill the entire 80 gallon water container. Meanwhile Shak had water still in her house since her condominium tank was large and had enough water for up 3 days.

Now in January 2024, we had another burst pipe in Sungai Perai. Water was cut without any notice and 80% of our island was left without any water. Some of us still had the water we collected in December for another water disruption. But most of my neighbours had discarded the water  were left with no or very little water in the water tanks in our houses. This time around, MS and Sofi were not around. Ak had to carry the water to fill up all the pails in the house. The water was only trickling in the porch. So we had to catch the water and transfer to other parts of the house. I helped filling pots with water for the kitchen use. 

So the Water Supply Corporation of my island announced that there will upgrading works for the burst water pipe.The old  underwater pipeline is incurring a leak. This old pipelines will be decommisioned and replaced with new pipes. Thus we have to brace for another major water disruption in 2 weeks. In the meantime, they will try to patch up the leaking pipe and supply water  to all the disrupted area. My neighbour, who has a large family decided to invest in a huge water tank placed outside his house. This attracted so many other neighbours to come and have a look at this shining marvel. My neighbour was so proud of his investment and even tried to influence Ak to purchase one. Of course his sister is selling the motor and she will give us a good price, he said. I put my foot down and told Ak absolutely no tank sitting in our porch . We noticed the pump and motor for this water tank, makes a very irritating noise. I even heard the noise in the middle of the night. So the next day when Ak was chatting wih the neighbour, he brought up the subject of the noise. Now this neighbour admits he didn't know about the noise before buying it. Unfortunately there is nothing he can do about it. So for now we have to adjust living in our house with this irritating noise until my neighbour decides to shut it off.

In the meantime, we are continously storing water and using water sparingly. Clothes cannot be washed at home because the water pressure is so low, we cannot turn on the washing machine. For now we have send our clothes to the laundry. I also cooked a few meals and freeze them. It is not safe to eat out when almost 80% of the island will be out of water. Of course I am grateful that we at least have some water and a roof over head during this crisis. I cannot imagine how life is in Gaza where water is deliberately shut down to torture the civilians. I feel so privileged when I turn on the pipe at home to see water flowing. We have to accept a little difficulties in life and stop complaining too much. What we are going through is not even an ounce compared to the people of Gaza. Anyway, I pray for the safety of the divers who are doing the dangerous job of going underwater to address the leak. 

The Hospital Visit

Today is the dreaded day! I have my routine appointment to see my doctor every 4 months. Usually our day starts after morning prayers. We talked to MS than straight away to shower and get ready. Then we had our breakfast and headed to the hospital. For the first time in so many years, we got to see the doctor DR. O as soon as we arrived at the hospital. This particular doctor I have been seeing her for the past 15 years. Lately she talks to me very bluntly and I might add a little rudely too. Anyways the consultation took a few minutes and this time she recomended for me to take medication for my slight elevated sugar, I politely declined and told her I will try and modify my diet and exercise before considering her suggestion. 

This is the kind of doctors I would like to avoid. They think everything can be corrected by popping pills. No advice on natural path, diet control or supplement intake. Unfortunately I am too tired to bring my entire history and build a rapport with a new doctor. For now I am stuck with this one. Same goes to my dentist. You see this dentist Dr. A that I have been visiting for the last 15 years, does not have a good reputation. She is clumsy and her charges are high. But.... she talks well, gentle and the important thing is she listens to me. I am absolutely terrified of dentists. She is a very sisterly kind of dentist and will not force me to go through procedures that I am not comfortable with. Of course my children and Ak are not happy. But then, who is the patient? I ask them. So for now, I am definitely not changing dentist. I have an appointment to fix 3!!! crowns with her in a couple of weeks. Wish me luck. I hope I am going to keep this appointment. 

Happy 2024

 When new year dawns upon us, the phrase a new beginning is always used. New beginning according to Google is to allow yourself to accept challenges that bring good things to you. This past 4 years of my life had been the most challenging one. from the onset of covid, I had several health issues that kept me off my  daily routine. There was a point when I even forgot what a normal day I used to have. We don't notice some of these blessings until we loose them. As time goes on, I accepted these challenges and put my faith in Allah swt, that what I am going through is going to strengthen me. 

Good health is one of the biggest blessings people take for granted. No matter how much money one has, or how successful the person is, as soon as they are faced with health issues, everything else take a backseat. Good health is not only the absence of disease, it also means your mental and social well being. Maybe that is why I had encouraged my children to study medicine, when they showed an interest in this field. Now my son, MS is a qualified doctor and doing his GP training. Lil Sofi, isnt little anymore. This young lady is in her final year as a medical student. 

If I could turn back the clock, I certainly will advice them to choose another field like their big sister who is an accountant. I noticed my son MS, who used to be a jovial light hearted teenager, became a very serious and reserved young man since he became a doctor. Sofi on the other and who was already a serious  person has become so reclusive. I find myself asking them "where is your smile? Have you lost it?' Maybe it is not the job, maybe it does not happen to everyone. But it happened to my children. I want them back as how they were, growing up. Nobody talks about the social well being and mental health of medical students and junior doctors.They are meant to be able to handle everything that is put on their plate. I totally disagree. As a mother of 2 children who studied and studying to be doctors, I see how much work, time and sacrifices they put into their daily life. Everyday is studying, every single day for 5 years and beyond. Beyond this 5 years, days will still be as challenging or proberbly more challenging. We just need to put our faith in the Almighty because He said in the Quran Al Kareem,  " Allah does not obligate anyone beyoind his capacity" 2:286. With that I am signing of for now, Hopefully I get back my interest to write on my blog again.